Anonymous , Age: 22

I got pregnant while using contraceptives. I realized that my menstruation was delayed, my breasts were swollen and sore beyond the time they should be. I felt lateral pains, as if they were on my tubes, some days more on the right side, others on the left. I felt my body slowing down. I took a pharmacy test 7 days later and the result was positive. I had an ultrasound in a place that did not require a medical prescription to prove that it was not an ectopic pregnancy, it was not, there was a gestational sac located in the uterus.

Due to a number of facts I couldn’t continue with this pregnancy, I love children, I want to be a mother, but at that moment this would not be possible. Then, after having taken the decision with my partner came another phase, how to do it? After some research we found the name of Misoprostol pills, known as cytotec, which are not sold in Brazil, and can only be purchased illegally. I believe this is the worst part, because women are left at the mercy of a clandestine market, which charges high prices and gives no guarantee that they are legitimate. After reading several testimonials on different sites, I was terrified of the possibility of being scammed, or not having the money to buy them, and worst of all fear of this whole process taking more than the 12 weeks because I had to have the abortion safely. The most reliable sites were from foreign institutions, and in normal circumstances the delivery would take around 20 days and with the pandemic this time could be extended even further. Also the purchase had to be made with an international credit card that I did not even have. After contacting several strange resellers, I remembered a friend who could help me get it. But then there was another doubt, the websites, the dealers, the testimonials, each one had different ways of using the medication. Some talked about intravaginal use, others sublingual, others advised to macerate the pill, swallow after half an hour, spit after half an hour, 4 pills, 6, 8, 12 … I no longer knew what to do! Fortunately I found safe2choose, where I found a wonderful person named Julia, and we chatted in Portuguese. I talked to her about my doubts with the procedure and the number of pills. She clarified my doubts and guided me according to the protocols of the World Health Organization explaining which were the scientifically proven procedures. Following what was said on the conversation I bought 8 pills. I was 5 weeks and a few days of pregnant. I prepared myself, organized the schedule and used the pills. In the middle of the process I went back to the chat and Julia was online, so I asked more questions. I told her about my symptoms, she guided me again, reassured me that the process seemed to be happening normally. I took 1 ibuprofen and a nausea medication at 9:00am, and at 10:00pm I took 4 misoprostol, 200mg each, sublingually. After half an hour I swallowed the rest, and felt chills, had diarrhea, mild cramps and light bleeding. So I used a bag of hot water for the cramps, and laid to watched TV. After 4 hours and 4 sublingual pills more, I checked my temperature every 1 hour and there was not much variation. As soon as I took the second dose I went to pee and a clot of blood came out with a small white ball. Every time I went to pee a clot came out, just like with menstruation only more and a little bigger. I asked Julia a few times about my bleeding, because I expected a lot and she told me that it depends on each women. My bleeding was not much, it was less than my biggest flow of menstruation, something like a third day flow. I had uncomfortable cramp on the early evening, I stayed under the hot shower crouching, which helped a lot. The cramps extended for three days. I took ibuprofen and used a hot water bag. I had bleeding for nine days, it wasn’t much, only 2 pads per day were enough. I kept talking to Julia because, my breasts were still sore. 15 days after using the pills I had a new ultrasound somewhere else, and everything was fine, no signs of pregnancy. Both ultrasounds were transvaginal and after the second one I had some bleeding.

After 16 days my breasts returned got back to normal, I had no more pain or swelling. I spoke to Julia again to tell her about the results and the bleeding, she answered my doubts and guided me on the use of contraceptive methods. Reflecting on the abortion process now, I see why it is done at home in so many countries. It is a little uncomfortable, but it’s not terrifying. It’s only cramps and a little blood. Of course it makes all the difference if you are in a quiet place, with support and guidance. Now I see the importance of professionals at safe2choose giving guidance on how to have the procedure safely. I understand what the risks are and how to avoid another unwanted pregnancy. Even though it is such a safe procedure, the simple support of someone already makes the difference. Julia was crucial for me at that moment. Thank you for supporting women when they cannot speak out.

Select your country